A false start
A tear in her heart
2AM Poetry ~ Rene
This little bit of prose was inspired by my cleaning out a closet full of baby clothes and items.
I started out pumped up, ready for the task, unloading…making space and donating the items to a local shelter who could really use them this time of year.
Little did I know that within minutes of starting the task I’d be sobbing into a onesie!
When I spotted the flyer asking for donations of baby clothes and lightly used items I saw this as a perfect opportunity to clean out the closet in the back room.
And I love me a good closet ass kicking.
I think my people were nomads as I tend to jump on any opportunity to rid myself of any and all excess baggage.
Gotta travel light 🙂
The main reason behind stockpiling all these teeny tiny treasures for nearly ten years had been for “just in case”…
Coffee in hand, I set out to tackle the back room and sort out the outfits according to season and size instead of just throwing them into a Hefty bag.
Because in my mind I am so much more organized than I really am, I do not procrastinate and I love biting off more than I can chew…
The first box , the larger sizes, were fairly simple to get through…but I found the smaller the clothing got the harder it became.
I picked up the little yellow sweater, that dreaded little yellow sweater..awww…how tiny and precious it was, like doll clothing. Mary used to look so damned cute in it…I couldn’t stand it! Just recalling her in it, as an infant, sent a gang of tears flooding…and soon enough, there I was, choke sobbing and ugly crying right into the nearest available onesie.
This was the first time I had faced…”we won’t be needing these anymore”, a statement I had just said matter of factly to myself before getting to work. And sitting there in that bright morning sun, amidst boxes of baby clothes, the reality of that statement dawned on me…we won’t be needing these anymore…Unfortunately I do not think my heart is up to speed on this revelation, as far as it’s concerned, I’m still 25…plenty of time!
…and although I had no problem letting go of the treasures, I have to admit I was having a hard time letting go of “just in case”.
Is it at all possible to age backwards?
I did manage to get all of the clothes sorted, boxed and shipped away to their new little “memory making” destinations.
But I did hold onto one little yellow sweater…just because 🙂
Peace ~ Rene
Photo Note: Mary would not oblige and, once again, wear the yellow sweater 🙂 I do have pictures of her as infant in it but I don’t have a scanner. She did offer her Husky webkin in sneakers as a worthy substitute, but eschewed the very idea of it wearing the sweater because it would ruin the “fuzzy look”……..artists 🙂